You could argue that a friendly match is a way to practice, to learn. So when Chiellini faked an injury to trick a Dutch player into stopping his attack, you could say that that was a moment for everybody to learn: this is how a World Cup match is going to be played. But the Dutch player would never have stopped play when this had been a World Cup match, he stopped because it was a friendly. A friendly is not a World Cup match. So why the stress, the anger, the mean kicks and the faking?
The Italian goal was a hands ball, but did Circhetta see that? I don't think so, because he just stood there. His assistant didn't because he was clearly pointing at the centre mark, Circhetta seemed to hesitate: look at those angry players, maybe they are right? The guy who scored was seen in full screen walking off with a red face, his mates asking "what happened". The Dutch went on shouting, Circhetta canceled the goal. Good decision, as proven by the replay, but why wait?